• Marriage is a beautiful union, but it is also a journey filled with lessons and constant adjustments
• Many couples who thought marriage a bed of roses get a reality check after exchanging vows 
• In this article, 15 Nigerians share their thoughts on what they wish they knew before getting married 

Marriage is often seen as a beautiful journey of companionship, love, and commitment. While that is true, there’s also another side to marriage that can only be witnessed after the vows. 

For many Nigerians, marriage comes with lessons and realisations they wish they had known before entering this lifelong commitment. In Nigeria, marriage isn’t just a union between two people, it often involves both families. 

Cultural expectations, financial responsibilities, and social roles make marriage rewarding and, at times, more challenging than expected. Many couples find themselves surprised by just how much their lives have to change after saying, “I do.”

15 Nigerians share the one thing they wish they knew before getting married. Their experiences shed light on common but rarely discussed aspects of marriage that everyone planning to get married should consider.

What 15 Nigerians wish they knew before marriage

“Before marriage, I could take spontaneous trips or hang out with friends without planning ahead. Now, it feels like every decision has to be discussed. I love my wife, but I sometimes wish I had prepared for this change in freedom.” - Adebayo

“I didn’t realise how marriage would take me away from my family. I miss being able to spend weekends at my parents’ house. My husband is amazing, but sometimes I just long for a weekend at home with my siblings and parents, and I am always eager to visit them now.” - Ifunanya 

“Marriage taught me that cooking becomes a full-time activity. I expected that I'd cook, of course, but I never imagined I'd be in the kitchen this often! I wish I knew what it took to give birth and take care of a baby. I didn’t know I would no longer have my space and freedom.” - Adeola

“I used to make quick decisions without second thoughts, but marriage changed that. Now, even small choices like weekend plans or where to invest have to be agreed on. I didn’t expect I’d have to run everything by my wife.” - Chinedu

“One thing I miss is having time just for myself. Between work, home responsibilities, and spending time with my husband, 'me-time' has become a luxury. I never imagined that marriage would take so much of my time.” - Folake

“I thought I’d only focus on taking care of the home, but I’m also working and contributing financially. Balancing work, managing the household, and making ends meet is a real challenge. I wish someone had told me how intense this would be.” - Stella

“I had a very low tolerance for certain habits, but marriage has taught me to let go of the little things. My husband isn’t perfect, and neither am I. Marriage has shown me how to tolerate and overlook what I once found unacceptable.” - Ifeoma

“Before marriage, I had a clear plan for my career and goals. But marriage brought responsibilities that sometimes delayed my personal ambitions. I never realised how much adjusting I’d have to do to balance family and personal goals.” - Segun

“No one warned me that my husband would call his mom about every little decision. It’s like she’s the third person in our marriage.” Deborah

“Growing up, I thought finances would be easy to handle in marriage, but combining finances with my spouse has been one of the biggest surprises. I didn’t expect it to require much planning, trust, and compromise.” - Seun

“One of the hardest parts of marriage is learning to compromise and often be the peacemaker. I didn’t know I’d spend so much time resolving conflicts. It takes patience and maturity, things I wasn’t prepared for when I got married.” - Tolu

“I always thought love-making would be an everyday thing in marriage, I never knew the desire for it could dwindle so much. Now, we go months without intercourse. Work, responsibilities and life have taken away my high libido.” - Seyi 

“I had big ideas about married life being one endless romantic date night, but the reality? We start a show, and he’s asleep halfway through it. It’s safe to say that ‘Netflix-and-chill’ is mostly just Netflix.” - Esther

“I didn’t realise I would be woken up every morning by my husband’s morning erection.” -  Blessing

Before marriage, I had the idea that intimacy would always be frequent and spontaneous, but life’s responsibilities sometimes get in the way. We’re both exhausted by the end of the day, and I didn’t anticipate how much effort it would take to keep that spark alive. It’s something we both work on now, making time for each other and prioritising intimacy.” - Tola

“Marriage is a serious business and not a tea party.” - Dr Ibrahim

Love and Lust Corner: 10 people share what made them fall in love with their spouses

Meanwhile, TheRadar earlier reported that 10 Nigerians shared stories of how they fell in love with their partners. 

For some, it was a single moment that sparked a connection, and for others, it is a series of little things that gradually won their heart.